My first baby, Five years. I haven’t stopped longing for you. Never will. With each year, my longing is covered in more hope, peace and comfort. Hope in knowing that with each day, I am closer to seeing you. Peace in knowing you have forever life with Jesus and grandparents and cousins and your Uncle. … Continue reading Five Years of Missing My First Baby
Cold Air & My Brother in Heaven
I did something I haven’t done in a long while. I walked to my son’s school, instead of driving, to pick him up. I am not entirely sure what compelled me to walk. I hadn’t planned to. There was potential for rain (although we got home before it started). And I usually avoid rain at … Continue reading Cold Air & My Brother in Heaven
3 Years of Loving You
My dear baby, It’s been 3 years. After we lost you, I didn’t think I could survive another day. I felt so heartbroken, lost, confused, and alone. I didn’t get out of bed for a week, which was probably a good thing. My body needed to heal physically after all it had endured. Here we … Continue reading 3 Years of Loving You
At the Crossroad of Joy and Grief
The holidays, especially motherhood during the holidays, have shown me that joy and grief can truly coexist. There’s something about being gathered on the ground with my sons in a mess of paper and boxes, laughter and smiles filling the room, that tugged on my heart for the 4th little Rodriguez that should be here. … Continue reading At the Crossroad of Joy and Grief